Man where to begin… The semester was going well. My grades were promising, and I was in a good, motivated state of mind. Nothing could slow me down and I had the world on a string. All that motivation that once filled every nook and cranny of my being, that pushed me forward, was abruptly demolished. SARS-CoV-2 is a son of a bitch.

While overall, I have been able to maintain an adequate level of ability to complete my work and continue to study I have certainly failed compared to my pre-covid abilities. The amount of internal debate it takes just to get up and get started on the work for the day is exhausting. When I can find the nugget of motivation needed to get started, I find it far too easy to become distracted with the constant movement of my world around me. Not to mention, I was clean of gaming for a solid 2 years before this and god damn it if I didn’t re-download my entire steam library since this happened. My sister is now living with us again along with her impulse bought puppy, and my mother works from home accompanied by her behemoth of a dog. These days I find, quite hilariously, that what brings me peace and eases my anxiety is going to work in the Emergency room.

The constant distractions of my home life emphasize to me my need for the more structured learning environment that comes with taking in person classes. I have the self-discipline, motivation, and responsibility to get done what needs to get done in that situation. I discovered years ago that when I attempt to bring the bulk of education into the setting of my home, work just doesn’t seem to get done.

I spent two years at an online school in middle school and weather it was due to my immaturity or youthful adolescent brain, I never could grasp the whole online school thing. Since then I have been a firm believer in in person education. The cooperation and discussion that comes with being physically present for a class has no relative as of now in the online world. The debate that I would have nearly every class with my tablemates was crucial to the concretion of the material in my mind. Additionally, being able to teach others what I knew, and learn from others who knew better than I was about as good as education can get Nevertheless, the entire student body of colleges and universities across the country have been thrust into a situation with a lack of choice.

What has been done I know was brought upon us for our own good. I’d like to believe that all of this is for the betterment of our country but fuck if I’m not angry about it. I don’t want to sound like I’m complaining. I mean I know that I am, but I also know that a lot of my fellow students across the country, not just in college but other levels too share the same sentiment. I have sympathy for the parents across the world with children in k-12 who are being expected to take up the reigns of “teacher” and aid their students in their education. Hopefully this will be the push America needs to finally recognize educators as the hero’s that they are and maybe give them the compensation that they deserve.  

To focus in more on the chemistry, I believe that just before our education got plunged into the abyss we were on Electrochemistry. I think this will have been the last subject that I am confident I have a solid grasp of. This was the last subject that I was able to cooperate with my fellow classmates on. The last subject I was able to discuss and argue about with people, in person. The last subject that was discussed by Clarissa for the whole class. I think it helps that it was interesting to me, and honestly, I was really looking forward to the lab where we were going to get to make voltaic cells but that hope got just about crushed in a matter of days.

The absolute chore of having to teach myself the remainder of the coursework would have been made worse if I didn’t have anything to test my knowledge. Luckily, Smart works has once again proved its worth to me. Being able to hop on there after reading a chapter and fight through getting the right answers really helps me to fully, or at least as fully as I can, understand some of the content before I start on the tests which have been so graciously given (not a joke, I really do appreciate them.) After working through the smart works homework’s, I like to work through the related problems on the tests and quizzes given to us. This gives me an opportunity to even further my understanding of the content.

If anyone deserves a prize this semester its my tablemate and friend, Robby. He took the initiative to seek out my phone number (not sure where from but I’m glad he did it) and spark up a dialogue about our tests and quizzes. We have been each other’s accountability bros, looking over each other’s work and pointing out differences and why we may have gotten different answers. After some discussion we normally come to one or several conclusions. A: one of us was wrong. B: both of us were wrong. Or C: neither of us were wrong but significant figures wound up giving us different answers. I love the example of one of the kinetics questions that he pointed out a mistake I made on 1 calculation that led the rest of my calculations to be wrong. I fixed that one then fixed the rest, but my answer was off by two decimal points which I pointed out to him. After re-entering his values into his calculator, he realized that he had made a simple error and fixed his work. It is a system that has been invaluable to me in finishing off this semester.

That type of cooperation used to be performed physically, in class but over text and phone is an acceptable alternative that I think everyone should endeavor to have.

About lab, I found that the substitute labs have been an interesting endeavor and one that I appreciate greatly. I had no clue how they were going to continue a chemistry lab online, it seemed inconceivable to me that they would be able to make it work. Luckily the faculty were able to find those online virtual labs, and all is well in the world. Don’t get me wrong, I miss the hell out of getting to go to the physical lab and perform actual experiments to retrieve actual data. This is a nice alternative to get us through to the end though.

So far in the semester, things have been going better than expected. I really enjoy the model of self education with perfection in the classroom, like I mentioned in my other entry I had my serious suspicions about the way that this was set up but overall, I find it rewarding to be able to solidify a concept in my head at home before even coming to class.

In class, the other members of my table have been just exceptional as a support chain. Concepts that I do not fully understand are usually understood by one of my classmates at the table and when they don’t understand, I am usually able to provide some level of clarification. It is a system that I’m sure the other two would say works well.

Chemistry this semester, and in general, I have found to be particularly challenging, but in a good way. I am for the most part, mathematically minded and I love solving problems, or at least the method of solving problems. I don’t deal very well with the abstract so wherever I can get a fairly solid answer, I’m pretty happy. This year’s chemistry has been primarily math based, the act of using formulas and arithmetic to find an answer is enjoyable to me.

Another topic that I feel could be discussed in a positive light is the labs. While a few of them have been fairly monotonous, such as the titration labs, the calculations and graphs that I have been able to do with them has been fun. I like seeing the end product and being pleased with the results. In both instances where I have made graphs this semester I have had pretty textbook looking curves so that was nice. Also, like aforementioned, The calculations to reach an endpoint and being able to use my graphs to get a answer that is semi close to what it should be is kinda like a sport for me and immensely enjoyable.

One thing that I have been struggling with is time management this semester. I took things easy last semester but I really ramped up my work hours this semester and my reserve unit is taking on a mission that requires a lot of work to be done at home in preparation for it. all of this means that I have to be diligent in keeping up with my tasks, both at home, at work, at school, and in the Army.

I think that something I could benefit from is keeping a planner. I have bought planners in the past with the intention of using them but a lot of the time I would write a few things at the beginning of the semester and then forget about it for the rest. For the most part I would do okay at remembering to do things but this year has been a tsunami of work. I do believe that if I could steadfastly use a planner to its full capacity I would be much better with my time.

Going into this class I had my doubts about the teaching methods of this teacher. I spoke to a former student of Clarissa’s and she explained to me how the semester would be structured. This filled my heart with dread. I thrived off of the structured lecturing of my Gen Chem 1 class, how would I fare in a situation such as this?

We are now a few weeks into this course and even though we have not yet taken the first exam I am feeling confident in myself. I realize now that this course is very dependent on the individuals ability to maintain self discipline. To be able to tucker down and get the material under your belt before you come into class.

Many of my who attend CNM, including myself, have jobs outside of school and it can be difficult to find the time to read a whole chapter out of the Gilbert Chemistry textbook. Even thought the Openstax and Gilbert chapters don’t exactly match in terms of material in the chapters. I find that the Openstax textbook distributes the majority of the same material in much more succinct terms making it quicker to read and easier to digest. This is opposed to the massive chapters in the Gilbert Textbook that can leave me overwhelmed and confused.

Another method I have found that helps me to succeed in getting the information required is to make attempts at the homework, if not, try and finish the homework before even coming into class. this gives you a chance to apply the information you just read in the books. Doing so, I find, helps to solidify my learning before even coming to class.

One of my favorite parts of this class so far is the ability to apply your newfound knowledge in class. Like previously mentioned this gives us the opportunity to get solid foundations for the information that will help us on the test. The ability to ask questions in class from the expert on these problems is something that might otherwise be lost in a conventional lecture class.

In addition to the “lecture” class the approach overall that CNM takes towards the labs is in my opinion superior to UNM’s methods. To ask the students to make an entire procedure and safety data sheets etc. about experiments that are foreign to them is an approach I’m not entirely convinced in. In the words of a Wise man, “You don’t know, what you don’t know…” asking students to design experiments they know nothing about surely can’t be conducive to meaningful learning. the structure that the CNM labs provides is able to give a more deep understanding of the material in lab and how it correlates to what is being discussed in class.

Overall, I am enjoying this class so far. We will see as the semester goes on how I am able to maintain self discipline in order to do well in this class but I will continue to strive for excellence in all things I do.

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